Branch 58something Newsletter Volume 2
Everything in our branch is going according to the plan of some higher authority!?! We are eagerly waiting to know how many more benefits we are going to lose.
We get the King James Bible from Kay but Beth comes along with the Revised Standard version suiting only her taste; so we are left in the dark, like the mushrooms, until we get a new revision.
Our “Get the Fuck out-a-here Resume’ Inc.” is going quite well. Four more of our illustrious members have decided to jump ship. Dan did not want to do any more landscaping. Robert kept erasing Paul’s files so he had to go back home. Chad used his Father’s influence to build a Tyrannosaurus Rex at Security Plastics. George (the Godfather) was given a “deal he could not refuse”; an Alabama transfer with the condition that he leave his Aquaman suit at the Thrift store.
We recently had our “Grasshopper” training (HAZWOPER). Now at least we know which direction to run when the shit hits the fan!
We are eagerly waiting Congress to pass the minimum wage increase so we can get another DIME.
Everything is NORMAL at our office... The ‘E’ Supervisor is still fighting with the Project Coordinator; We still have no idea where the BOSS is; Mr. Richer has successfully kept Black Cloud in line for the last 3 months.
We have delegated the ceiling tile job to the Filipino Connection. They are doing a great job. Our trainer was seen sleeping under I95 in a card-board box!?!... Thanks Joe!
We took the drill and the mouse away from Peaches brother “Cream” (the mad scientist). He’s chilling’ now and hanging’ out with the rest of us.
We have reports that our trainer has finally been given the go-ahead on targeting our interests. Therefore, the training schedule for the month of June is a bulls eye. Topics will include: Effective Resume’ writing, The Do’s and Don’ts of interviews, Management 101, and my personal favorite- “Did you get that in writing?”
The dress code is changing. Everyone is going to wear cowboy boots, and Rob’s already gone... isn’t that ironic?
For awards, The Purple Heart awards go to Nestor and Hermes for the longest suffering. They will be pinned to their Derriere by the Mechanical lead man during our next crew meeting.